Saying goodbye…

One might think the hardest part is leaving your friends and family behind to go on this exciting adventure… but saying goodbye to the people you met during this experience is much more difficult because those you do not get to say goodbye to temporarily…

My friend who came to Amsterdam with me just moved out of our apartment today. She left Amsterdam “for ever” and took off to Barcelona where she will spend the summer with her boyfriend. This event validates the end of our journey and that’s why it’s so difficult. The feeling I got when I closed the door behind her was close to abandonment even though it’s really not! I can’t say we depended on each other, but we came here together and just knowing we were there for one another in case of need was a reassuring feeling. The positive thing is I will see her when I return to Montreal where we will finish our education together.

Now there are close to a hundred more goodbyes to say. First of all, goodbye to all the international students. Those people you lived in the same building as, went to school with, partied with, and just shared the experience with. Those who were your friends, your friends for a period of six months... Some you will miss, and some you will deeply miss. Some you might visit, some you might write to on a regular basis, others you will somewhat stay in touch with, but there is a good chance most of them you might not see nor speak to very much anymore. What’s also difficult is that they all leave on different days, so it’s like taking off a band-aid slowly instead of all at once. Coming here we all knew we would have to say goodbye in the end as it’s part of the process, but thinking about it and experiencing it are two different things.

Then you have to say goodbye to the local friends you made, those who were so helpful throughout the semester as they were able to give you advice on about everything. For my part, I will miss one girl in particular, one very special girl with a golden heart. One who would be a very close friend of mine if an ocean did not separated us. As I mentioned to her, coming to Europe I knew I would make friends, but I could have never imagined meeting a friend I would care about this much. It’s truly heartbreaking to know you might never see that person again, but I guess you need to be thankful that your lives crossed.

One last painful goodbye to say is goodbye to freedom. Indeed, living abroad is like putting your life on hold. You can almost compare it to living someone else’s life. You move to a foreign country, you don’t know anyone (other than the friends you came with), you don’t speak the language, you don’t work (although you could) and you go to school but your grades don’t count (depends on your school). It’s comparable to a long vacation where you have the opportunity to learn and reflect on your life.

This wonderful chapter of my life is sadly coming to its end, but I will make sure I enjoy every single moment that is left. I am looking forward to having a memorable last month despite all the heartbreaking goodbyes I will need to face.